el salvador.

so i graduated may 9th and headed down to central america that weekend. i spent most of my time in el salvador, a country about the size of massachusetts that was consumed by a brutally violent civil war between 1980 and 1992. this immersion trip had special meaning for me, since i had devoted much of my senior year to writing my Honors paper on human rights in el salvador, specifically about the practice of torture during the civil war. this trip allowed me to meet the survivors and experience how the country has recovered, and understand that in some ways the war has not yet ended.

here are some fragments from the journal i kept while i was there:

"I had written about the death squads and government-sponsored murder, so it is extremely interesting for me to be here and see/hear first-hand what I have been researching. It affected me on a totally different level actually being here and visualizing the death squads, than simply reading descriptions and statistics."

"Radio Balsamo is dedicated to promoting democracy in the community [Zaragosa] and offers people a forum to voice their concerns and to organize. They asked if Danny and I would go on-air for a few minutes and explain who we were and why we were there and then answer some questions, since Danny and I are the only two in the group who really speak Spanish. It was a bit nerve-wracking and I know I made some mistakes but it really was exciting!"

(during my homestay in Zaragosa):
"Esmeralda made us coffee and eggs and we were able to talk with her. She told me about her life - about the war and how it had affected her family, about torture, and about having to start over. I translated all of this to Jacob, which felt a little strange because I knew she felt comfortable relating her painful past to me, but I wasn't sure about him...
She told me that during the war her father was suspected of being a guerrilla (even though, in reality, he was not). For that reason her mother and father were arrested and jailed, and her family was separated for eight years. Her father was tortured because they thought he had valuable information about the guerrilla forces and could give up key names and locations. Meanwhile, her brother, who WAS a guerrilla, was brutally murdered. They still do not know what happened to his body
When the family was reunited (save her brother, whose name she did not share), her father was still in danger, so they fled to Zaragosa for refuge. They had to leave their house, all their cultivated land, and everything else they had known. They even had to change their names. They traveled to Zaragosa and had to start from scratch. They built a new house, and cultivated new land.
Then Esmeralda began to tear up as she began to recount the story of her older sister. Her sister had not gone with the family to Zaragosa. She was married and had stayed with her husband and father-in-law. The armed forces captured them and tortured them. They killed her husband and his father. They raped and tortured her, and left her for dead in a ditch. Somehow, however, she managed to get up - bleeding and wounded all over - and walk. She walked until she reached a small pueblo, where she was admitted into the hospital. She was there for a few months, and had begun to heal, when the armed forces found out she was there. She was warned by somebody working at the hospital that they would be coming for her, and he helped her escape the day before they came. Now her sister lives in Zaragosa with the rest of her living family."
...
"Esmeralda makes $60-70 a month, which is not enough to live on, but is better than the $15 she used to make...
She said that since the war, the economic situation has not really improved... few jobs...low pay.."

(During our visit to the Liberation Museum in Perquin):
"After our visit, we had a talk with Mario, who is in charge of the museum and a former guerrilla. During the discussion, he said some really profound things that I would like to remember:
- He said that for each year of war, it takes 20 years to recover
- He said that the people responsible for the war crimes must be brought to justice - the impunity must be reversed. Then, they could be FORGIVEN and the country could begin to heal.
- He said that in war, there is not one good side and one bad side. Both sides made many errors.
- Although the Peace Accords were signed in 1992 the war is not over yet. People are still hurting. Those responsible should step forward and apologize so they can be forgiven and the country can heal.
**Mario was such a jolly and sweet man. Despite his experiences and the destruction of his country, he was happy and proud and optimistic about the future of El Salavdor."

(During the visit to El Mozote)
"El Mozote is where the biggest massacre of the war occurred. They estimate that 1100-1300 people died at El Mozote. Many remains were never identified, and it is impossible to give each perished soul a name.
The Church in El Mozote is standing just as it was at the time of the massacre. You can see the dents from bullets on the ground and in the entrance and in the garden, as well as the stain of blood that has not washed away in 28 years. On the outside walls on either side are beautiful murals. On the right side is the happiest depiction I have ever seen. It was an image of kids playings (silhouettes of young children), stars, rainbow, sun. The colors are just so bold and bright and the kids seem so innocent and joyful.
Standing there, I could not help but feel genuinely HAPPY! Even though, at the bottom of the mural were plaques with the names of 146 children, 140 between the ages of 2 days and 11 years, who on one dark day in 1981, were locked inside and brutally murdered. The babies were thrown in the air and caught with machetes.....
...And I am in awe, as I have been so many times throughout this trip, at the ability of these people to remain hopeful - to remember the children as they were when they were alive and at their happiest, to believe that in heaven, they have returned to that joyful, innocent state.
...
Later, we walked to another part of town, into a foresty area where we could identify the remains of a house. That house was where many women of El Mozote were locked inside and bombed - Fragments of their bones still lie in the soil...."

(After our visit to the Aragon Foundation):
"Alas! I am in love. jaja. This morning we visited the Aragon Foundation, where we met Guillermo (or Guie as he told me to call him), the founder of Aragon. Aragon foundation provides education to elementary and high-school-aged kids in El Zaite, an area of Zaragoza controlled by gangs. The foundation also offers various weekend activities for the children to keep them occupied so they are less likely to get caught up in the gang-life. There are also classes for the adults of the community (i.e., about hygiene and carpentry). Many of the parents are gang members, and some of them really do want the best for their children. Nonetheless, their home-life is very dangerous. Guie has meetings with the gang-leaders every month to negotiate terms and help assure that the school and students are kept safe (He admitted that he does get quite nervous before each meeting and the short meetings are always extremely stressful). Many of the students are at school from 6am to 7pm or 8pm, and some even stay overnight because going home is too dangerous. For those that do go home, the school has a private bus that picks them up and drops them off, so they do not have to walk. Each child is also given a uniform, (including shoes, which many of them have never previously owned).
Aragon is funded by Belgian donors. Guie's parents died during the civil war, and he was adopted by a Belgian family. He spent most of his youth there, and then moved back to Zaragosa to start Aragon. The donors are all connections he has back in Belgium, whom he reports to throughout each year.
Even though Guie speaks like 6 languages fluently, spoke to us only in Spanish (I think he was self-conscious about his English). I was so impressed by this whole organization and how it was really offering theses children an alternative future (saving hundreds of kids from the gang-life), that I spoke to Guie for a long time after the presentation. Bob and I were both interested in the possibility of returning to work with the organization, so I asked Guie if that would be a possibility. He said he would love for me to return, but if I were to stay longer than a month it would be quite dangerous. If I were to stay for up to a month I could sleep at the school, but I would still need to sacrifice any "partying" or night-life outside of the organization, due to the gang presence.... Either way, I have his contact information. I would really like to help out in the future, in some way."

so these are just a couple reflections i had during my time in central america. i am off to europe in a couple days to begin another adventure, this one of a completely different nature. updates to come...